Sorry for the lack of posting, life has been busy, but I am making progress and hanging in there!  I have been drinking smoothies for breakfast and then topping it off with a boiled egg a couple of hours later.  I was thinking this was pointless and not getting me anywhere.  Until this morning when I weighed myself!  Let me back track a little...


OK, so every Thursday is date night for my husband and I.  On Fridays we usually take the kids out to eat.  So, last week we ate at PF Chang's on Thursday and Cinzetti's Italian Market on Friday.  And to top it off, we went to a birthday party Saturday afternoon at a buffet!  Holy smokes, I should be bursting out of my pants.  But I am not!  And the scale is still in my favor!  I ate about 3/4 of my food at PF Chang's.  Thursdays are my night for not watching too close to what I eat.  Friday, although it was all you can eat, I did not over do it.  I was so proud of myself.  I did indulge in my favorite dessert from there though...Saturday at the buffet I was pretty good.  I did not over do it and watched what I ate.  I passed on the birthday cake even.


After all of that, I was worried the scale was going to kick me off.  So far so good!  I have been good this week.  I drank a smoothie every morning so far.  I was about to pass it up this morning, but when I checked my weight this morning, I was so pleasantly surprised that I did drink it.  I discovered that it is not my favorite and I kind of killed my appetite for a while.  That was a good side effect! lol  


So, here we are back at Thursday date night and I am not going to pay much attention to what I eat.  Since I am down more weight than I thought, I feel like I am in a good spot.  I still have not exercised and I not sure when I will be starting the gym.  I will shoot for a month and pray for the best, lol.  Its all been portion control and trying to eat healthier.  So, so far so good.  No change in the way my clothes are fitting just yet, but I feel better knowing that my weight is starting to decrease.  I have these dreams of what I can do with my body.  What it is going to look like, how clothes are going to look on me.  That put an image in my mind of something I have not had in a long time.  I was 17 when I last had a "little black dress" and I want one!  I am trying to decide if I should weight until I lose the weight or go pick on out now and make it my goal to fit into it.  What do you think?  Please leave comments below, I would love to know what you think.


That is about it for now...kind of a boring blog today, lol.  Stay tuned as I make this happen!

                                              

I Heart Bacon

                                           

                                               

This has been a slight struggle for me, trying to be as good as I can, but dang it...I LOVE BACON and I miss it!  And it is a no no right now.  I have come up with some funky combinations for bacon, but the above picture is NOT one of them.  I mean, I do love my bacon, but not that much! lol  Of course there is turkey bacon, but it is not the same at all!  I have been getting by with imitation bacon bits on my salads, lol.  I have seen some positive results!  Yeah me!  Its not a huge difference, but the number on the scale is going down...I have yet to exercise, one step at a time, lol.  Speaking of exercise, I think I might be making a huge leap forward with that soon.  We were out this last weekend for a friend's birthday party and ran into an acquaintance we had not seen in a couple of years.  He is a personal trainer and was telling about the gym he was working at now.  I explained to him what I want to do and he explained how it would be done, lol. And I am having mixed feelings about it.  

A lot of women want to be thin and healthy, this I know.  And I am one of them.  I know I can do this my way.   His way would work even better and probably give me more detailed and faster results.  But his way is so damn harsh! LOL  He explained that I would have to give him complete control for lack of a better way of putting it.  Which means, I eat what he says, I exercise what and when he says.  My issue with this, is that I do not want to become a slave to my own body.  Does that make sense?  

As I have stated before, I do not deny myself all things good to eat.  I don't think that is a good idea.  My way is portion control and trying to eat right.  His way will be balls to the wall, get her done kind of diet.  And there is that word I hate, DIET!  It will be an automatic exclusions of most carbs I am sure, all sugar and starches, etc...Wow, I sound like a whiny baby, huh?   I think I am just afraid, afraid of the failure.  At least with my way, I am not set up for immediate failure.  As long as I stick to what I am doing, eventually I will get to where I want to be.  No frowny faces if I take a big bite of my husband's brownie.  No feeling guilty if I skipped a salad or something.  Working with a personal trainer however, this is going to be tough!  

Maybe it is a blessing in disguise.  Maybe it is just what I need to get the weight off and keep it off.  Maybe, just maybe...I can really to this!  I think it will make me more likely to stick to the plan if I have to answer to someone.  I don't know, we'll see how it goes.  Along with the benefits of using a personal trainer, comes the expense.  That is why I cannot just jump in.  I have to figure out how long I will have to use his services before I can be left on my own to do this and get the final costs.  I am getting a lump sum raise next month, and I think this is going to be a good thing to invest that money in.  Until then, I think I am going to start weighing myself like this:  

                                                

So much to look into to, so much to plan for and so much to accomplish!  I can't wait to meet my new body someday.  I am sure she is fabulous!  Until I can start with the trainer, I am going to stick to my current regimen and hopefully see some size reduction soon.  I found this on the web and thought it would useful to share with all of you: (Via naturopathyworks.com)

If you crave this…	What you really need is…	And here are healthy foods that have it:
Chocolate	Magnesium	Raw nuts and seeds, legumes, fruits
Sweets	Chromium	Broccoli, grapes, cheese, dried beans, calves liver, chicken
	Carbon	Fresh fruits
	Phosphorus	Chicken, beef, liver, poultry, fish, eggs, dairy, nuts, legumes, grains
	Sulfur	Cranberries, horseradish, cruciferous vegetables, kale, cabbage
	Tryptophan	Cheese, liver, lamb, raisins, sweet potato, spinach
Bread, toast	Nitrogen	High protein foods: fish, meat, nuts, beans
Oily snacks, fatty foods	Calcium	Mustard and turnip greens, broccoli, kale, legumes, cheese, sesame
Coffee or tea	Phosphorous	Chicken, beef, liver, poultry, fish, eggs, dairy, nuts, legumes
	Sulfur	Egg yolks, red peppers, muscle protein, garlic, onion, cruciferous vegetables
	NaCl (salt)	Sea salt, apple cider vinegar (on salad)
	Iron	Meat, fish and poultry, seaweed, greens, black cherries
Alcohol, recreational drugs	Protein	Meat, poultry, seafood, dairy, nuts
	Avenin	Granola, oatmeal
	Calcium	Mustard and turnip greens, broccoli, kale, legumes, cheese, sesame
	Glutamine	Supplement glutamine powder for withdrawal, raw cabbage juice
	Potassium	Sun-dried black olives, potato peel broth, seaweed, bitter greens
Chewing ice	Iron	Meat, fish, poultry, seaweed, greens, black cherries
Burned food	Carbon	Fresh fruits
Soda and other carbonated drinks	Calcium	Mustard and turnip greens, broccoli, kale, legumes, cheese, sesame
Salty foods	Chloride	Raw goat milk, fish, unrefined sea salt
Acid foods	Magnesium	Raw nuts and seeds, legumes, fruits
Preference for liquids rather than solids	Water	Flavor water with lemon or lime. You need 8 to 10 glasses per day.
Preference for solids rather than liquids	Water	You have been so dehydrated for so long that you have lost your thirst. Flavor water with lemon or lime. You need 8 to 10 glasses per day.
Cool drinks	Manganese	Walnuts, almonds, pecans, pineapple, blueberries
Pre-menstrual cravings	Zinc	Red meats (especially organ meats), seafood, leafy vegetables, root vegetables
General overeating	Silicon	Nuts, seeds; avoid refined starches
	Tryptophan	Cheese, liver, lamb, raisins, sweet potato, spinach
	Tyrosine	Vitamin C supplements or orange, green, red fruits and vegetables
Lack of appetite	Vitamin B1	Nuts, seeds, beans, liver and other organ meats
	Vitamin B3	Tuna, halibut, beef, chicken, turkey, pork, seeds and legumes
	Manganese	Walnuts, almonds, pecans, pineapple, blueberries
	Chloride	Raw goat milk, unrefined sea salt
Tobacco	Silicon	Nuts, seeds; avoid refined starches
		I hope this helps some of you, I am going to study it well and see what benefits I can reap from it!  OK, that is it for now...until next time, stay healthy!

Operation "Weight-Loss" Is Under Way!

We are to the point of my story where I should tell you my starting weight and my goal weight...but I am not going to do that. Let's just say when I step on the scale it begs me to step off.  Although my weight does scare me, it is just a number really.  What matters is how I feel and look.  So, instead of a weight I am picking a size.  I would love to be a size 8, and I will settle for size 10.  Size 10 is a very reachable goal and if by chance I get to the 8, well...GO ME!

So, all this week I have been good with sticking to the plan.  Smaller portions, trying to pick the healthier things and so forth.  I have been eating my favorite frozen lunch entrees, Lean Cuisine all week long.  They were on sale for $1.69!  I am not a big fan of the Weight Watchers meals and Healthy Choice may have one choice that tastes good!  I add some yogurt, piece of fruit, sometimes some carrots and a lot of salads.  Also, pretzels and flavored rice cakes have been good this week.  I know, I know...your mouth is drooling as you read this, please don't be jealous!

I try to take the stairs and hit some extra floors, but it is not happening on a daily basis.  Not due to laziness, there are just some days I do not have the time at work to do that, (and I have no stairs at home, lol).  I would love to have an elliptical...it is low impact, so easy on the joints and gives you are harder work out than a treadmill.  I know I will need more than that eventually, but I figured it would be a great start.  It's just not in the budget at the moment.  

I want to back track a little here...here's the "skinny" on my weight over the years.  I have never been called a rail, a tooth pick or even considered skinny and I never wanted to.  I have however been a healthy size.  Before I started having kids I had a flat tummy and now I have this stretched out, flabby layer of what seems to resemble my stomach.  Since then, I have dreamed of a body that could stop traffic, but not because I couldn't get my ass across the intersection before the light changes!  Ugh...I have gone up and down multiple times, but never once have I been back at my pre-pregnancy.  I would start to do good and  then I would revert to my bad habits.  Something had to give!

Not to make excuses, because I really hate excuses, but in my previous life, I had a very degrading and non-supportive husband.  That made my weight that much more of a challenge.  Well the past is the past and we shall leave that at that...I now have a WONDERFUL husband who compliments me all the time.  In fact, I sometimes have a hard time taking those compliments.  I am getting better at it, but it is also part of my driving force to keep at this and make it happen.  So, here we go...

Now back to the present:  It is tough eating right.  I mean, I know it is great for me and I know that the benefits out weigh the instant gratification we can get from food.  But let's face it, no matter how hard you work at being good  and making smart choice, sometimes you just have to eat the damn Oreo!  That is part of my "modified eating plan".  You can have these forbidden items!  If you deny yourself all the time it will eventually it will consume you.  Its back to the portion control and and not going over board, it does take will power.  If you have already added exercise into your daily routine, maybe some extra workout.  But you can have it.  

I joined Weight Watchers once, once...I did good.  I lost 13 pounds in about 4 weeks.  I followed the points system and went to their meetings, at first.  I worked nights at the time and I was unable to go to my regular meeting so I scheduled one at the meeting place at a mall.  I weighed in, they all clapped and so on.  Then the meeting started.  This lady was complaining that her kids always made brownies and the brownies were taunting her, (what mean brownies they were!)  She goes on to say that she resisted as long as she could.  Then in a moment of weakness after weeks and weeks, she lost it and ate half a pan!  Mind you now, I am thinking back then like I do now.  You cannot always deny yourself. Everyone is looking at her with deep sympathy and she is in tears.  Honestly, I wanted to laugh, how horrible am I?  I piped up and said, "Why didn't you just eat one or half or a bite, something like that?"  OMG!  I had every eye in the place on me and it was not a comfortable feeling.  

You would think telling someone at a WW meeting to eat a brownie was worse than any sin.  They actually booed me, (YES!  For real!)  and explained that you cannot give in, that was like giving up...Bull $h!t!  Whatever people.  At this point, I am plotting in my head the quickest escape route from the mall.  I feared these very hungry and very angry people were going to beat the hell out of me if they could catch me.  I couldn't wait for the meeting to be over!  I sat with my head hung down, not making eye contact with anyone.  At the end I bolted for the door and made to my car in a matter of a minute.  I never went back. 

So, here it is, nearing the end of the first week of taking this serious again.  Maybe I will be brave and post a pick this weekend, so you can see what I am working with here.  This is my record of obtaining my goal.  I hope that my perseverance can inspire some of you!  Until next time...

By the way, here I am before. I can't wait for the after!

                                                  

I Think I Found The Weight You Lost

Guess what!  According to government guidelines, I am overweight!  They are telling everyone to get in shape. Get in shape?  I am in a shape...round is a shape, right?  I'm not fat, I'm fluffy.  I'm just big boned is all.  I just had a baby, (10 years ago), my mommy says I'm perfect and she loves me just the way I am!   Yada yada yada...OK, so I am bigger than I should be and you know what...I am 100% to blame for it.  No one but me made me this way, (although I would like to argue a little about genetics).  I did it!  ME, ME, ME!  Yoohoo, over here!  


The closer I get to 40, the harder this gets.  I am 38 and I do get frustrated and angry with my weight, but not as much as I get with others who blame everyone and everything under the sun for them getting fat! I can say this about blame, when I stopped smoking over 5 months ago, I packed on the extra pounds very well if I do say so myself.  I didn't change the way I ate much, if at all...but by not smoking, my heart rate is lower and my metabolism slowed.  It is still my fault though, lol.  I obviously eat more than my body needs.  Now, the trick is to find that right amount and make it work for me.  


I have lost weight before.  I did a great job!  I lost about 50 pounds, and I am currently in the process of finding it again.  I do not like the word diet, I prefer modified eating plan.  I did most of it with changing my eating habits.  I did not restrict much, it was portion control for the most part.  I had been asking questions and researching all the different weight loss plans out there.  I increased the protein, (leaner protein), I drank water like a fish, I ate 3 meals a day and snacks in between.  I tried my best to increase the fiber, that is one I still have an issue with, lol.  I chose whole grains whenever possible and tried to have dinner gone before 7 or so at night.  I eventually started the add in exercise, and lost more weight, but then for some reason, I just stopped with it all together.  What a dumb ass move on behalf!


Well, here I am again...fluffy, frustrated and ready to make a change.  I want to look good for myself and I want to have a body my husband really wants to check out.  Of course he tells me all the time he thinks I look great, I don't think it would hurt anything to look even better!  Stayed tuned for my progress and see how long I keep my sanity intact!