We are to the point of my story where I should tell you my starting weight and my goal weight...but I am not going to do that. Let's just say when I step on the scale it begs me to step off. Although my weight does scare me, it is just a number really. What matters is how I feel and look. So, instead of a weight I am picking a size. I would love to be a size 8, and I will settle for size 10. Size 10 is a very reachable goal and if by chance I get to the 8, well...GO ME!
So, all this week I have been good with sticking to the plan. Smaller portions, trying to pick the healthier things and so forth. I have been eating my favorite frozen lunch entrees, Lean Cuisine all week long. They were on sale for $1.69! I am not a big fan of the Weight Watchers meals and Healthy Choice may have one choice that tastes good! I add some yogurt, piece of fruit, sometimes some carrots and a lot of salads. Also, pretzels and flavored rice cakes have been good this week. I know, I know...your mouth is drooling as you read this, please don't be jealous!
I try to take the stairs and hit some extra floors, but it is not happening on a daily basis. Not due to laziness, there are just some days I do not have the time at work to do that, (and I have no stairs at home, lol). I would love to have an elliptical...it is low impact, so easy on the joints and gives you are harder work out than a treadmill. I know I will need more than that eventually, but I figured it would be a great start. It's just not in the budget at the moment.
I want to back track a little here...here's the "skinny" on my weight over the years. I have never been called a rail, a tooth pick or even considered skinny and I never wanted to. I have however been a healthy size. Before I started having kids I had a flat tummy and now I have this stretched out, flabby layer of what seems to resemble my stomach. Since then, I have dreamed of a body that could stop traffic, but not because I couldn't get my ass across the intersection before the light changes! Ugh...I have gone up and down multiple times, but never once have I been back at my pre-pregnancy. I would start to do good and then I would revert to my bad habits. Something had to give!
Not to make excuses, because I really hate excuses, but in my previous life, I had a very degrading and non-supportive husband. That made my weight that much more of a challenge. Well the past is the past and we shall leave that at that...I now have a WONDERFUL husband who compliments me all the time. In fact, I sometimes have a hard time taking those compliments. I am getting better at it, but it is also part of my driving force to keep at this and make it happen. So, here we go...
Now back to the present: It is tough eating right. I mean, I know it is great for me and I know that the benefits out weigh the instant gratification we can get from food. But let's face it, no matter how hard you work at being good and making smart choice, sometimes you just have to eat the damn Oreo! That is part of my "modified eating plan". You can have these forbidden items! If you deny yourself all the time it will eventually it will consume you. Its back to the portion control and and not going over board, it does take will power. If you have already added exercise into your daily routine, maybe some extra workout. But you can have it.
I joined Weight Watchers once, once...I did good. I lost 13 pounds in about 4 weeks. I followed the points system and went to their meetings, at first. I worked nights at the time and I was unable to go to my regular meeting so I scheduled one at the meeting place at a mall. I weighed in, they all clapped and so on. Then the meeting started. This lady was complaining that her kids always made brownies and the brownies were taunting her, (what mean brownies they were!) She goes on to say that she resisted as long as she could. Then in a moment of weakness after weeks and weeks, she lost it and ate half a pan! Mind you now, I am thinking back then like I do now. You cannot always deny yourself. Everyone is looking at her with deep sympathy and she is in tears. Honestly, I wanted to laugh, how horrible am I? I piped up and said, "Why didn't you just eat one or half or a bite, something like that?" OMG! I had every eye in the place on me and it was not a comfortable feeling.
You would think telling someone at a WW meeting to eat a brownie was worse than any sin. They actually booed me, (YES! For real!) and explained that you cannot give in, that was like giving up...Bull $h!t! Whatever people. At this point, I am plotting in my head the quickest escape route from the mall. I feared these very hungry and very angry people were going to beat the hell out of me if they could catch me. I couldn't wait for the meeting to be over! I sat with my head hung down, not making eye contact with anyone. At the end I bolted for the door and made to my car in a matter of a minute. I never went back.
So, here it is, nearing the end of the first week of taking this serious again. Maybe I will be brave and post a pick this weekend, so you can see what I am working with here. This is my record of obtaining my goal. I hope that my perseverance can inspire some of you! Until next time...
By the way, here I am before. I can't wait for the after!
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